Fat Woman had missed two consecutive Friday evening boxercise classes for the first time since she had started attending back in April because she was staying in a different city.
Fat Woman was a little nervous about returning because the new instructor had been very hostile to her, calling her feedback "criticism". Fat Woman had simply told him the same as she'd told every other instructor, that if they don't tell people to swap partners she doesn't feel able to say that she wants to when no one else does.
As it turns out the Boxercise Boy was as sweet as pie, going out of his way to be charming, funny and encouraging. Fat Woman had a great class and is looking forward to going again.
Fat Woman really enjoyed feeling that she'd had a great workout. Fat Woman has missed exercise during the ten days she was away.
Showing posts with label boxercise. Show all posts
Showing posts with label boxercise. Show all posts
Saturday, 17 November 2012
Sunday, 16 September 2012
Fat Woman goes to Boxercise
Fat Woman has been going to BoxFit at her gym since April. At first Personal Trainer protected Fat Woman, but now Fat Woman holds her own in both boxing and mat work. Fat Woman is still awfully slow when it comes to running, but that may pass. Fat Woman loves nothing more than to spend the best part of an hour doing hard and fast pad work cut with some killer mat work. Fat Woman is still surprised that she thinks like that, but she's rolling with it.
Tiny Friend has been an absolutely marvellous gym buddy for Fat Woman. Tiny Friend has been paying a second gym subscription since Personal Trainer was no longer able to sign her in. This works out at £9.25 a class. Understandably, Tiny Friend wondered if perhaps there was another class that both she and Fat Woman could try. Fat Woman wasn't keen, but thought it was only fair that she be open to the suggestion. There are rules of reciprocity governing friendship after all.
Tiny Friend and Fat Woman got up on a Sunday morning to go to a 10am Boxercise class at the local community centre. Fat Woman was reasonably keen because the night before Thin Husband had taken her out for a fabulous dinner and she had eaten quite a lot.
The community centre has been much improved since Fat Woman was last therein 2007, although the receptionist - a middle-aged man with the most put-upon attitude Fat Woman has seen in a while - was not the brightest spark. The receptionist was insistent that Fat Woman and Tiny Friend had to do this, and come back to him, then do that, and come back to him. Fat Woman thought it was inefficient but suspects he couldn't cope with compound tasks. Fat Woman feels like that when she's been drinking the night before.
Boxercise class was held in the sports hall. The hall was host to six badminton courts, a basketball court, an indoor football court, a netball court and possibly a hockey pitch. Fat Woman was trying to decipher the markings laid out in different coloured tape. The Boxercise instructor made sure everyone made good use of the hall, which was lucky because he certainly didn't give anyone a chance to make much use of their pads or gloves.
After a ten minute warm up of jogging around the hall the instructor got everyone to do two jabs, one after the other, Fat Woman assumed he was warming everyone up and soon they would be punching away. Fat Woman made no issue with the instructions on how to punch one pad after the other, how the pad man should say "One-Two" and put the pads down afterwards, although she could practically hear Personal Trainer not saying anything in the special way he does. The instructions on where to hold your hands when you weren't punching were just shocking. Fat Woman is the first to admit that she has a lazy right arm, and has been hit on the head for it, but she fails to see what good your hands will do if you rest them on your boobs.
That was it. One-Two. Then Three-Four. This was two high hooks. That was IT for the entire class.
No combinations.
No sit-ups.
No rounds.
No uppercuts.
Fat Woman was BORED. Usually when Fat Woman leaves BoxFit class she feels she's had a great workout and needs a shower. In Boxercise the only reason Fat Woman broke a sweat at all was because the instructor got the pad men to stand in different parts of the hall and made the boxers run between them. If Fat Woman wanted to go running she'd go running. Fat Woman doesn't want to pay £5 and get up on a Sunday morning to go running. Fat Woman certainly doesn't want to go running hampered by a pair of boxing gloves.
Tiny Friend is now satisfied that the gym BoxFit class is worth the financial investment for her.
Fat Woman thinks it was worth £5 to be able to sneer forever at Boxercise classes and be able to refuse to go ever again. Fat Woman considered it would have been worth another £5 to have the experience of being too fit for a class billed as "hardcore".
Tiny Friend let Fat Woman go to the car boot sale afterwards as a reward for not telling the instructor how rubbish his class was and that he was a coward for not letting Fat Woman give him a pair of hooks.
Tiny Friend has been an absolutely marvellous gym buddy for Fat Woman. Tiny Friend has been paying a second gym subscription since Personal Trainer was no longer able to sign her in. This works out at £9.25 a class. Understandably, Tiny Friend wondered if perhaps there was another class that both she and Fat Woman could try. Fat Woman wasn't keen, but thought it was only fair that she be open to the suggestion. There are rules of reciprocity governing friendship after all.
Tiny Friend and Fat Woman got up on a Sunday morning to go to a 10am Boxercise class at the local community centre. Fat Woman was reasonably keen because the night before Thin Husband had taken her out for a fabulous dinner and she had eaten quite a lot.
The community centre has been much improved since Fat Woman was last therein 2007, although the receptionist - a middle-aged man with the most put-upon attitude Fat Woman has seen in a while - was not the brightest spark. The receptionist was insistent that Fat Woman and Tiny Friend had to do this, and come back to him, then do that, and come back to him. Fat Woman thought it was inefficient but suspects he couldn't cope with compound tasks. Fat Woman feels like that when she's been drinking the night before.
Boxercise class was held in the sports hall. The hall was host to six badminton courts, a basketball court, an indoor football court, a netball court and possibly a hockey pitch. Fat Woman was trying to decipher the markings laid out in different coloured tape. The Boxercise instructor made sure everyone made good use of the hall, which was lucky because he certainly didn't give anyone a chance to make much use of their pads or gloves.
After a ten minute warm up of jogging around the hall the instructor got everyone to do two jabs, one after the other, Fat Woman assumed he was warming everyone up and soon they would be punching away. Fat Woman made no issue with the instructions on how to punch one pad after the other, how the pad man should say "One-Two" and put the pads down afterwards, although she could practically hear Personal Trainer not saying anything in the special way he does. The instructions on where to hold your hands when you weren't punching were just shocking. Fat Woman is the first to admit that she has a lazy right arm, and has been hit on the head for it, but she fails to see what good your hands will do if you rest them on your boobs.
That was it. One-Two. Then Three-Four. This was two high hooks. That was IT for the entire class.
No combinations.
No sit-ups.
No rounds.
No uppercuts.
Fat Woman was BORED. Usually when Fat Woman leaves BoxFit class she feels she's had a great workout and needs a shower. In Boxercise the only reason Fat Woman broke a sweat at all was because the instructor got the pad men to stand in different parts of the hall and made the boxers run between them. If Fat Woman wanted to go running she'd go running. Fat Woman doesn't want to pay £5 and get up on a Sunday morning to go running. Fat Woman certainly doesn't want to go running hampered by a pair of boxing gloves.
Tiny Friend is now satisfied that the gym BoxFit class is worth the financial investment for her.
Fat Woman thinks it was worth £5 to be able to sneer forever at Boxercise classes and be able to refuse to go ever again. Fat Woman considered it would have been worth another £5 to have the experience of being too fit for a class billed as "hardcore".
Tiny Friend let Fat Woman go to the car boot sale afterwards as a reward for not telling the instructor how rubbish his class was and that he was a coward for not letting Fat Woman give him a pair of hooks.
Friday, 27 April 2012
Fat Woman is thrown on the mat
Fat Woman has been enjoying her boxercise class. This is despite the fact Personal Trainer says his classes are not "Boxercise"(TM) but boxing fitness, or BoxFit for short. Fat Woman thinks it would have to be a pretty damn big box for her to fit in, but she will call it whatever Personal Trainer likes. Fat Woman is now on cheerful first name terms with everyone and is holding her own with the superfit people. Personal Trainer has listened and acted upon every piece of feedback that Fat Woman and Tiny Friend have given him. Tiny Friend is still rather shy of Personal Trainer and like to send her feedback via Fat Woman, but she did actually speak directly to Personal Trainer after the last class.
Fat Woman has always said that she can box but has awful problems with the Fit part of BoxFit. The very first time Fat Woman went to Personal Trainer's BoxFit class she tried to jog on the spot along with everyone else and instantly gave herself a stitch. This was nothing to the pain Fat Woman felt in her knees when she had to get up and down off the mat for each exercise. Personal Trainer noticed that Fat Woman was struggling and gave her an accommodation. Fat Woman's knees are much improved after visits to the osteopath and she doesn't find herself yelling in pain all the time now. This fortunate fact does not change the reality that when it comes to BoxFit mat work Fat Woman is the least fit person there. Fat Woman found that she could not plank, do press ups, sit ups or crunches, let alone mountain climbers. Fat Woman hadn't had a problem with this because she had no idea that planks or mountain climbers existed.
Personal Trainer changed the format of class so that mat work is now all in one lump at the end. Fat Woman is full of heartfelt and pathetic gratitude for this. It is much easier for Fat Woman to get down on a mat and stay there than it is to do sit ups, get up and box, then get down again. Fat Woman feels that because the mat work has changed to accommodate her that she would like to tackle it, as opposed to simply ignoring it and hoping it would go away. Usually Fat Woman gets an alternative from Personal Trainer. Fat Woman would like to be able to do at least some of the exercises.
Fat Woman has been pushing herself to actually do some mat work. When visiting the osteopath about her dodgy knees issue (patella tendon and some squashed cartilage), Fat Woman enquired about the pain in her lower spine when she lies on the mat. Previously Fat Woman had hurt the part between the sacrum and the lumbar spine by doing lots of breaststroke and was worried that perhaps it was inflamed. The osteopath diagnosed a ham string issue and told Fat Woman to do ham string stretches. This advice left Fat Woman blinking. Fat Woman is not entirely sure how stretching out your foot can cure back pain. However, the osteopath seemed to be right on the money. Lots of ham string stretches later and Fat Woman's back pain is minimal to non-existent.
Fat Woman is still a 300lb+ woman though, and lying on her back causes her some considerable discomfort. Fat Woman imagined she could feel her spine actually pressing on the mat, which is ridiculous because there is lots of fat between the mat and the spine, not to mention the skin. When Fat Woman added something soft under herself she found she was magically able to do sit-ups! There were only five sit-ups, and two days later Fat Woman's abs felt like she had given birth, but they were definitely sit-ups.
Encouraged by the new-found sit-up ability Fat Woman hit the mat during one of her gym sessions. It just so happened that Personal Trainer was working out at the same time. Unusually, Personal Trainer was not in the Big Boy's corner lifting 140kg and squatting 170kg (or possibly the other way around) but was hanging around at the other end of the gym making use of the TRX. Fat Woman was hiding behind the barbell rack, but the TRX is at 90 degrees to the mat area and Fat Woman had NOWHERE TO HIDE. Fat Woman cut her mat work short and went and did some stationary cycling instead, but she was fairly sure that Personal Trainer had spotted her. Fat Woman had this confirmed the following day when Personal Trainer introduced bridge holds into her training. Fat Woman is very good at bridge holds, having done them for more than a year in order to help with her back injury. Personal Trainer enquired about Fat Woman's mat work and Fat Woman had to admit that she could plank for a grand total of 10 seconds, and that she could do five sit-ups.
Personal Trainer repaid Fat Woman's candour by introducing her to table tops and crunches. Fat Woman was not at all grateful.
Fat Woman can do table tops if she has a cushion under her coccyx. The same goes for crunches. Fat Woman has to actually bring a cushion into the gym, but Fat Woman is a 300lb woman and needs some accommodation, dammit. Fat Woman has also found that using two mats instead of one is beneficial.
Fat Woman found some excellent online resources and went back to the mats armed with a set of exercises to do. The list comprised:
Superman
Sit-ups
Crunches
Dorsal Raises
Ham string curls
Lunges
Bridge holds
Planks - front and side
Press ups
Mountain climbers.
Fat Woman did all the exercises with the exception of the mountain climbers. In her little blue exercise notebook Fat Woman actually wrote "fuck this!" under the mountain climber heading. Fat Woman even annotated it with the date.
Doing all this mat work left Fat Woman vaguely aching the following day. Much encouraged Fat Woman went cheerfully off to BoxFit, where Personal Trainer gave the class a set which started with a mountain climbers, went on to a table top hold, moved through rotating legs in the air and then turned into crunches.
Fat Woman considers her enthusiasm for mat work to be well and truly squashed.
Fat Woman has always said that she can box but has awful problems with the Fit part of BoxFit. The very first time Fat Woman went to Personal Trainer's BoxFit class she tried to jog on the spot along with everyone else and instantly gave herself a stitch. This was nothing to the pain Fat Woman felt in her knees when she had to get up and down off the mat for each exercise. Personal Trainer noticed that Fat Woman was struggling and gave her an accommodation. Fat Woman's knees are much improved after visits to the osteopath and she doesn't find herself yelling in pain all the time now. This fortunate fact does not change the reality that when it comes to BoxFit mat work Fat Woman is the least fit person there. Fat Woman found that she could not plank, do press ups, sit ups or crunches, let alone mountain climbers. Fat Woman hadn't had a problem with this because she had no idea that planks or mountain climbers existed.
Personal Trainer changed the format of class so that mat work is now all in one lump at the end. Fat Woman is full of heartfelt and pathetic gratitude for this. It is much easier for Fat Woman to get down on a mat and stay there than it is to do sit ups, get up and box, then get down again. Fat Woman feels that because the mat work has changed to accommodate her that she would like to tackle it, as opposed to simply ignoring it and hoping it would go away. Usually Fat Woman gets an alternative from Personal Trainer. Fat Woman would like to be able to do at least some of the exercises.
Fat Woman has been pushing herself to actually do some mat work. When visiting the osteopath about her dodgy knees issue (patella tendon and some squashed cartilage), Fat Woman enquired about the pain in her lower spine when she lies on the mat. Previously Fat Woman had hurt the part between the sacrum and the lumbar spine by doing lots of breaststroke and was worried that perhaps it was inflamed. The osteopath diagnosed a ham string issue and told Fat Woman to do ham string stretches. This advice left Fat Woman blinking. Fat Woman is not entirely sure how stretching out your foot can cure back pain. However, the osteopath seemed to be right on the money. Lots of ham string stretches later and Fat Woman's back pain is minimal to non-existent.
Fat Woman is still a 300lb+ woman though, and lying on her back causes her some considerable discomfort. Fat Woman imagined she could feel her spine actually pressing on the mat, which is ridiculous because there is lots of fat between the mat and the spine, not to mention the skin. When Fat Woman added something soft under herself she found she was magically able to do sit-ups! There were only five sit-ups, and two days later Fat Woman's abs felt like she had given birth, but they were definitely sit-ups.
Encouraged by the new-found sit-up ability Fat Woman hit the mat during one of her gym sessions. It just so happened that Personal Trainer was working out at the same time. Unusually, Personal Trainer was not in the Big Boy's corner lifting 140kg and squatting 170kg (or possibly the other way around) but was hanging around at the other end of the gym making use of the TRX. Fat Woman was hiding behind the barbell rack, but the TRX is at 90 degrees to the mat area and Fat Woman had NOWHERE TO HIDE. Fat Woman cut her mat work short and went and did some stationary cycling instead, but she was fairly sure that Personal Trainer had spotted her. Fat Woman had this confirmed the following day when Personal Trainer introduced bridge holds into her training. Fat Woman is very good at bridge holds, having done them for more than a year in order to help with her back injury. Personal Trainer enquired about Fat Woman's mat work and Fat Woman had to admit that she could plank for a grand total of 10 seconds, and that she could do five sit-ups.
Personal Trainer repaid Fat Woman's candour by introducing her to table tops and crunches. Fat Woman was not at all grateful.
Fat Woman can do table tops if she has a cushion under her coccyx. The same goes for crunches. Fat Woman has to actually bring a cushion into the gym, but Fat Woman is a 300lb woman and needs some accommodation, dammit. Fat Woman has also found that using two mats instead of one is beneficial.
Fat Woman found some excellent online resources and went back to the mats armed with a set of exercises to do. The list comprised:
Superman
Sit-ups
Crunches
Dorsal Raises
Ham string curls
Lunges
Bridge holds
Planks - front and side
Press ups
Mountain climbers.
Fat Woman did all the exercises with the exception of the mountain climbers. In her little blue exercise notebook Fat Woman actually wrote "fuck this!" under the mountain climber heading. Fat Woman even annotated it with the date.
Doing all this mat work left Fat Woman vaguely aching the following day. Much encouraged Fat Woman went cheerfully off to BoxFit, where Personal Trainer gave the class a set which started with a mountain climbers, went on to a table top hold, moved through rotating legs in the air and then turned into crunches.
Fat Woman considers her enthusiasm for mat work to be well and truly squashed.
Sunday, 15 April 2012
Fat Woman is teacher's pet
Fat Woman is now training with Personal Trainer twice a week. On Friday Personal Trainer announced that he was going to teach Fat Woman a boxing combination and that she would demonstrate it to the rest of the boxercise class that evening. Fat Woman is slightly clueless at times so didn't think much about this. The only thing that occurred to Fat Woman was that Personal Trainer was being very nice to her by giving her a chance to practice the combo. Fat Woman doesn't like words like "combo" and "crimbo" but due to repeated use by Personal Trainer the word "combo" has crept into her lingo. Fat Woman also remembers "combinations" being some kind of underwear in Victorian times so doesn't like to make too much of a stand on this.
It was a counter-intuitive combination that took Fat Woman a couple of minutes to get. It went:
Fat Woman encourages you to try this combination. Combinations are much easier if they are in even numbers or can be split into equal timings e.g. 1-2, 1-2, 1-2 or 1-2-3, 1-2-3. This is 1-2, 1, 1, 1, 1-2-3, 1, 1 and not even on a left then right split.
Fat Woman trotted blithely along to Boxercise that night feeling cheerful and confident that she would not disgrace herself or Personal Trainer if she was called upon to take part in a demonstration. Fat Woman knows Personal Trainer well enough now to be quite fast at pad work. If Fat Woman doesn't hit too hard she can go fast enough to be impressive. Fat Woman was confident she had the combination down so when Personal Trainer called upon Fat Woman, saying: "Fattie, get up here" halfway through Boxercise class Fat Woman was clueless and cheerful enough to respond with a cheerful "Woof!" as though she was a dog responding to a whistle.
Fat Woman did not expect what was reported to her by Tiny Friend as a "definite ripple" from the other class attendees, who were mentioned in http://fatwomanfit.blogspot.co.uk/2012/03/fat-woman-meets-fit-kids.html. Fat Woman liked hearing about this after the fact and enjoyed imagining the surprise of the Fit People who were wondering "Why her? Why not me?"
Fat Woman stood with Personal Trainer, went through the combo slowly, then punched it out twice more in quick succession. Personal Trainer told everyone to work in pairs, then he and Fat Woman demonstrated the combination half a dozen more times. Nearly everyone else was having trouble with getting the combination.
After last Boxercise Fat Woman had admitted to Personal Trainer that she had come across a little bit of fat prejudice. Fat Woman had said that usually such people revise their initial opinion of her as lazy and stupid in under two minutes i.e. once they hear her speak but there was no way for her to show that in a gym environment. Fat Woman had shrugged this off after the initial annoyance and a lengthy blog post. Personal Trainer obviously hadn't forgotten it. After showing off the combination and a short rest Personal Trainer set Fat Woman to work with the young lady whom had made the erroneous assumptions about Fat Woman in the previous session. The difference in the body language and the demeanour of the young lady was incredible. Instead of being cocky and assuming she was in charge the young lady was instead the textbook illustration of "submissive". Fat Woman was very gracious when the young lady volunteered that she wasn't as fast as Personal Trainer and did not hit overly fast or hard.
Fat Woman is so very impressed with the cleverness of Personal Trainer. Fat Woman thinks Personal Trainer is a political genius and has made him both chocolate covered vanilla protein fudge and choc-mint-strawberry protein cake in celebration of this.
It was a counter-intuitive combination that took Fat Woman a couple of minutes to get. It went:
- Two left jabs
- Block the tap by Pad Man on the left arm
- A single right jab
- Block the tap by Pad Man on the right arm
- Right-left-right jabs
- Duck the Pad man's blow to the head
- Single right jab
Fat Woman encourages you to try this combination. Combinations are much easier if they are in even numbers or can be split into equal timings e.g. 1-2, 1-2, 1-2 or 1-2-3, 1-2-3. This is 1-2, 1, 1, 1, 1-2-3, 1, 1 and not even on a left then right split.
Fat Woman trotted blithely along to Boxercise that night feeling cheerful and confident that she would not disgrace herself or Personal Trainer if she was called upon to take part in a demonstration. Fat Woman knows Personal Trainer well enough now to be quite fast at pad work. If Fat Woman doesn't hit too hard she can go fast enough to be impressive. Fat Woman was confident she had the combination down so when Personal Trainer called upon Fat Woman, saying: "Fattie, get up here" halfway through Boxercise class Fat Woman was clueless and cheerful enough to respond with a cheerful "Woof!" as though she was a dog responding to a whistle.
Fat Woman did not expect what was reported to her by Tiny Friend as a "definite ripple" from the other class attendees, who were mentioned in http://fatwomanfit.blogspot.co.uk/2012/03/fat-woman-meets-fit-kids.html. Fat Woman liked hearing about this after the fact and enjoyed imagining the surprise of the Fit People who were wondering "Why her? Why not me?"
Fat Woman stood with Personal Trainer, went through the combo slowly, then punched it out twice more in quick succession. Personal Trainer told everyone to work in pairs, then he and Fat Woman demonstrated the combination half a dozen more times. Nearly everyone else was having trouble with getting the combination.
After last Boxercise Fat Woman had admitted to Personal Trainer that she had come across a little bit of fat prejudice. Fat Woman had said that usually such people revise their initial opinion of her as lazy and stupid in under two minutes i.e. once they hear her speak but there was no way for her to show that in a gym environment. Fat Woman had shrugged this off after the initial annoyance and a lengthy blog post. Personal Trainer obviously hadn't forgotten it. After showing off the combination and a short rest Personal Trainer set Fat Woman to work with the young lady whom had made the erroneous assumptions about Fat Woman in the previous session. The difference in the body language and the demeanour of the young lady was incredible. Instead of being cocky and assuming she was in charge the young lady was instead the textbook illustration of "submissive". Fat Woman was very gracious when the young lady volunteered that she wasn't as fast as Personal Trainer and did not hit overly fast or hard.
Fat Woman is so very impressed with the cleverness of Personal Trainer. Fat Woman thinks Personal Trainer is a political genius and has made him both chocolate covered vanilla protein fudge and choc-mint-strawberry protein cake in celebration of this.
Saturday, 31 March 2012
Fat Woman meets the fit kids
Fat Woman went to her third Boxercise class. Fat Woman is attending by special invitation of Personal Trainer. Fat Woman is accompanied by Tiny Friend. Tiny Friend is a much better gym buddy than Not Thin Friend. Not Thin Friend is late to classes and has a fairly high rate of absence. Always with an excuse of course, but Fat Woman has reached the stage where she prefers not to put her health in the hands of others. Tiny Friend is very keen and has got Fat Woman to purchase her new gloves and pads. Fat Woman is flattered that her eBay shopping skills are receiving the recognition they deserve.
Personal Trainer had said there were a lot of very fit regulars at the class. Fat Woman did not find that to be the case in her first two weeks. There seems to be a small knot of people who know each other from over the longer term but they all come sporadically. In each class there were only a couple of very fit people. The rest were beginners. Fat Woman is not very fit but she has been doing pad work with Personal Trainer for three months now and can punch hard and accurately. Fat Woman still has lots of room for improvement but she is not a total novice and she can keep up on the boxing.
This week there were several supposed "regulars" whom Fat Woman had not seen before. Fat Woman has been rather spoiled by the people she has met at the gym so far. To an extent this is because Fat Woman has been protected by Personal Trainer and Swimming Coach. When Personal Trainer or Swimming Coach introduces Fat Woman as someone who is worth talking to then people look at Fat Woman in that way. In Aquarobics all the ladies are very friendly, mostly because they are older and more secure.
In the competitive environment of Boxercise (or BoxFit as Personal Trainer likes to call it) Fat Woman has been exposed to a new type of person. Fat Woman is not competitive in situations where she has no chance of winning, but she enjoys pushing herself to keep up. Fat Woman is no threat to anyone in situations where she is outclassed and in fact gets a lot out of them. Fat Woman has said before that she doesn't mind being patronised by knowledgeable people. Fat Woman is prepared to learn from anyone who is about to share knowledge. Genuinely accomplished people are a pleasure to learn from.
In Boxercise class Fat Woman found herself with some fit, knowledgeable people. Fat Woman also found out there were some people who weren't so knowledgeable. Unfortunately these people were unaware of this fact. They were very obviously comfortable with their status as "regulars". Fat Woman was particularly unimpressed with one young lady who appeared to make the classic mistake that a fat woman is lazy and stupid. Fat Woman can live with such assumptions, allowing them to change over time as people realise that Fat Woman is actually brilliant and quick. Fat Woman gets particularly irritated by people who project that they think they are superior to Fat Woman but who actually aren't as good as they think they are. Fat Woman thinks that if you are going to patronise her about how to do a combination you really ought to be able to do your half correctly. Fat Woman also thinks that if you are going to rush through an exercise at speed banging hard into someone else should make you realise you aren't doing it as well as you think you are. Fat Woman is firmly of the opinion that once is a mistake but twice is deliberate or selfish sloppiness and it should make you doubly apologetic.
Personal Trainer did not miss any of these interactions and told Fat Woman to "punch it out". Fat Woman smiled sweetly and kept her further opinions to herself. Fat Woman has resolved not to bitch about this incident to Personal Trainer but instead to keep working. Fat Woman is not confident that she could explain the flash of prejudice that she sees in the eyes of some people. In other areas of life when some thinks Fat Woman is sub-human, somehow worth less, they realise their mistake within minutes. In an environment where people are measuring physical fitness on a limited axis Fat Woman is admittedly near the bottom of the food chain.
Something has changed inside Fat Woman recently. Fat Woman feels determined and empowered. Fat Woman is going to eat her way up the food chain.
Personal Trainer had said there were a lot of very fit regulars at the class. Fat Woman did not find that to be the case in her first two weeks. There seems to be a small knot of people who know each other from over the longer term but they all come sporadically. In each class there were only a couple of very fit people. The rest were beginners. Fat Woman is not very fit but she has been doing pad work with Personal Trainer for three months now and can punch hard and accurately. Fat Woman still has lots of room for improvement but she is not a total novice and she can keep up on the boxing.
This week there were several supposed "regulars" whom Fat Woman had not seen before. Fat Woman has been rather spoiled by the people she has met at the gym so far. To an extent this is because Fat Woman has been protected by Personal Trainer and Swimming Coach. When Personal Trainer or Swimming Coach introduces Fat Woman as someone who is worth talking to then people look at Fat Woman in that way. In Aquarobics all the ladies are very friendly, mostly because they are older and more secure.
In the competitive environment of Boxercise (or BoxFit as Personal Trainer likes to call it) Fat Woman has been exposed to a new type of person. Fat Woman is not competitive in situations where she has no chance of winning, but she enjoys pushing herself to keep up. Fat Woman is no threat to anyone in situations where she is outclassed and in fact gets a lot out of them. Fat Woman has said before that she doesn't mind being patronised by knowledgeable people. Fat Woman is prepared to learn from anyone who is about to share knowledge. Genuinely accomplished people are a pleasure to learn from.
In Boxercise class Fat Woman found herself with some fit, knowledgeable people. Fat Woman also found out there were some people who weren't so knowledgeable. Unfortunately these people were unaware of this fact. They were very obviously comfortable with their status as "regulars". Fat Woman was particularly unimpressed with one young lady who appeared to make the classic mistake that a fat woman is lazy and stupid. Fat Woman can live with such assumptions, allowing them to change over time as people realise that Fat Woman is actually brilliant and quick. Fat Woman gets particularly irritated by people who project that they think they are superior to Fat Woman but who actually aren't as good as they think they are. Fat Woman thinks that if you are going to patronise her about how to do a combination you really ought to be able to do your half correctly. Fat Woman also thinks that if you are going to rush through an exercise at speed banging hard into someone else should make you realise you aren't doing it as well as you think you are. Fat Woman is firmly of the opinion that once is a mistake but twice is deliberate or selfish sloppiness and it should make you doubly apologetic.
Personal Trainer did not miss any of these interactions and told Fat Woman to "punch it out". Fat Woman smiled sweetly and kept her further opinions to herself. Fat Woman has resolved not to bitch about this incident to Personal Trainer but instead to keep working. Fat Woman is not confident that she could explain the flash of prejudice that she sees in the eyes of some people. In other areas of life when some thinks Fat Woman is sub-human, somehow worth less, they realise their mistake within minutes. In an environment where people are measuring physical fitness on a limited axis Fat Woman is admittedly near the bottom of the food chain.
Something has changed inside Fat Woman recently. Fat Woman feels determined and empowered. Fat Woman is going to eat her way up the food chain.
Wednesday, 21 March 2012
Fat Woman does Boxercise
Fat Woman learned nothing from the spinning class debacle. When Personal Trainer invited Fat Woman to his Boxercise class and said she could bring a friend Fat Woman was again swayed by the privilege and the exclusivity of this offer. Fat Woman was delighted to share the advantage with a friend so it was with joy she trotted in to Boxercise on a Friday evening.
Personal Trainer had turned from the sweet young man Fat Woman sees on a Monday morning to a sergeant major. Fat Woman thought this was probably posturing, but wasn't totally sure and didn't want to risk being the person who landed the whole class with burpees so was extra quick in swapping gloves for pads.
Class started off with an instruction to form a line and jog on the spot. Fat Woman gave herself a stitch in a record 45 seconds. Fat Woman may be more capable than she was but jogging is still not something she has accomplished. After a moment of panic Fat Woman remembered she is in control of her own accommodations and switched to marching on the spot. Personal Trainer spotted this instantly of course but said nothing about it.
Fat Woman's accommodations were spotted and noted, most obviously by a young woman who spent the rest of the class copying Fat Woman's accommodations. When working with this young woman later Fat Woman had a revelation. Fat Woman is no longer a completely unfit person. In comparison to the innocent young woman who was much thinner but much less able to throw a punch, Fat Woman was an Olympic athlete. Well, someone who does triathlons anyway.
Fat Woman has had to take herself in hand and tell herself that if someone is even less fit that Fat Woman it doesn't necessarily mean that they are one step away from incapacity. Fat Woman put on her sympathetic attitude and modified her punches when partnered with the unfit young woman. It was a great relief when Personal Trainer pulled Fat Woman out for her turn at hitting the pads with him and she could stop going pap-pap-pap-pap and go back to her usual BAM-BAM-BAM-BAM!
Personal Trainer made an extra effort to encourage Fat Woman. Fat Woman felt like Teacher's Pet by the end of the session. Fat Woman thinks she would prefer to be useless in anonymity, but doesn't want Personal Trainer to feel his efforts were unappreciated.
Fat Woman late explained to Personal Trainer that she would not have gone to Boxercise if she had known that it involved so much mat work. Fat Woman's knees and back do not like mat work or even constant getting up and down. That is the reason why Fat Woman pays extra for Tai Chi lessons instead of taking one of the yoga or pilates classes the gym provides for free.
Personal Trainer said he was aware of this and that is why he didn't tell Fat Woman. Fat Woman thinks Personal Trainer is a cheeky young pup.
Fat Woman got through Boxercise and actually rather enjoyed it. One attendee said it was tougher than boot camp. Fat Woman doubts that but allows that will depend on how fit you are and which exercises you are fit at. Fat Woman is not going anywhere where people shout at you for real. Personal Trainer may try and be shouty in class but actually he is rather like a Pit Bull puppy barking at a visitor.
Fat Woman felt no ill effects from Boxercise until Sunday. A mysterious pain appeared across Fat Woman's abdomen. Fat Woman realised that despite all the abdominal work she had done (admittedly not a huge amount) that sit ups require muscle strength in a direction she obviously hasn't used before. Ever. Fat Woman wonders if the pain she experienced was similar to the one after giving birth. Fat Woman can't believe that Personal Trainer invited her to Boxercise over a month ago. Fat Woman would have died on the mats.
Personal Trainer said Fat Woman did very well in class. Fat Woman thinks he means she didn't run away crying. Fat Woman certainly didn't excel at the situps or planks. However, it was her first time doing them.
Fat Woman is going back to Boxercise on Friday evening. This is partly because Fat Woman said she would and partly because her Mother-in-Law is visiting. Boxercise is not that hard.
Personal Trainer had turned from the sweet young man Fat Woman sees on a Monday morning to a sergeant major. Fat Woman thought this was probably posturing, but wasn't totally sure and didn't want to risk being the person who landed the whole class with burpees so was extra quick in swapping gloves for pads.
Class started off with an instruction to form a line and jog on the spot. Fat Woman gave herself a stitch in a record 45 seconds. Fat Woman may be more capable than she was but jogging is still not something she has accomplished. After a moment of panic Fat Woman remembered she is in control of her own accommodations and switched to marching on the spot. Personal Trainer spotted this instantly of course but said nothing about it.
Fat Woman's accommodations were spotted and noted, most obviously by a young woman who spent the rest of the class copying Fat Woman's accommodations. When working with this young woman later Fat Woman had a revelation. Fat Woman is no longer a completely unfit person. In comparison to the innocent young woman who was much thinner but much less able to throw a punch, Fat Woman was an Olympic athlete. Well, someone who does triathlons anyway.
Fat Woman has had to take herself in hand and tell herself that if someone is even less fit that Fat Woman it doesn't necessarily mean that they are one step away from incapacity. Fat Woman put on her sympathetic attitude and modified her punches when partnered with the unfit young woman. It was a great relief when Personal Trainer pulled Fat Woman out for her turn at hitting the pads with him and she could stop going pap-pap-pap-pap and go back to her usual BAM-BAM-BAM-BAM!
Personal Trainer made an extra effort to encourage Fat Woman. Fat Woman felt like Teacher's Pet by the end of the session. Fat Woman thinks she would prefer to be useless in anonymity, but doesn't want Personal Trainer to feel his efforts were unappreciated.
Fat Woman late explained to Personal Trainer that she would not have gone to Boxercise if she had known that it involved so much mat work. Fat Woman's knees and back do not like mat work or even constant getting up and down. That is the reason why Fat Woman pays extra for Tai Chi lessons instead of taking one of the yoga or pilates classes the gym provides for free.
Personal Trainer said he was aware of this and that is why he didn't tell Fat Woman. Fat Woman thinks Personal Trainer is a cheeky young pup.
Fat Woman got through Boxercise and actually rather enjoyed it. One attendee said it was tougher than boot camp. Fat Woman doubts that but allows that will depend on how fit you are and which exercises you are fit at. Fat Woman is not going anywhere where people shout at you for real. Personal Trainer may try and be shouty in class but actually he is rather like a Pit Bull puppy barking at a visitor.
Fat Woman felt no ill effects from Boxercise until Sunday. A mysterious pain appeared across Fat Woman's abdomen. Fat Woman realised that despite all the abdominal work she had done (admittedly not a huge amount) that sit ups require muscle strength in a direction she obviously hasn't used before. Ever. Fat Woman wonders if the pain she experienced was similar to the one after giving birth. Fat Woman can't believe that Personal Trainer invited her to Boxercise over a month ago. Fat Woman would have died on the mats.
Personal Trainer said Fat Woman did very well in class. Fat Woman thinks he means she didn't run away crying. Fat Woman certainly didn't excel at the situps or planks. However, it was her first time doing them.
Fat Woman is going back to Boxercise on Friday evening. This is partly because Fat Woman said she would and partly because her Mother-in-Law is visiting. Boxercise is not that hard.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)