Saturday, 20 December 2014

Fat Woman and the arrival of Small Baby

Small Baby has arrived. Fat Woman is utterly besotted and totally in love with Small Baby, who is good and beautiful and everything a mother could want her baby to be. Small Baby is widely acknowledged to be a very pretty baby, which surprises Fat Woman as she had not expected to have a pretty baby. Fat Woman concludes that Small Baby takes after Thin Husband, who, judging from the photos, was also a terribly pretty child. Fat Woman is also glad to report that Small Baby has nothing wrong with her hearing what so ever, which means that the advice she took from medical professionals about it being safe to shoot whilst pregnant was sound and the rude old men who insisted that she shouldn't be shooting are full of their own self-importance and not medical evidence. Fat Woman notes that she stuck to 21g cartridges and using shotguns in the open air, as this kept the noise levels below 150 decibels, but she only mentions this in case anyone wanted to cite her as a reference. Fat Woman avoided using loud shells at particularly echoing trap grounds. but she was never much cop at trap anyway.

Fat Woman is home after a c-section. Apparently Fat Woman's recovery and healing have been extremely impressive. Fat Woman has no previous experience to judge by but is happy to take this under advisement. Fat Woman's midwife says that Fat Woman's excellent levels of fitness that she kept up throughout pregnancy are paying dividends now. Fat Woman only stopped training two days before she went into labour. What it did mean was that Fat Woman was out of bed immediately the drugs wore off i.e. first thing the next morning, and was barracking to be allowed to go home by 6am the next morning. Now Fat Woman has kicked the co-codamol and is surviving on the occasional ibuprofen/paracetamol combination. Fat Woman also has incredibly expensive blood thinners to inject twice a day, but apart from that she has been able to come off all the extra drugs. Unfortunately, Fat Woman's thyroid levels have gone utterly crazy but at least that was picked up straight away. That will take at least six months to sort out.

Fat Woman isn't sure how the rest of her fitness is going to go and is trying to remember that she's had a major surgery and that it's okay not to spend time elevating her heart rate or lifting weights. Fat Woman misses being able to exercise like hell especially as she can't even walk very fast thanks to her c-section cut. In fact, Fat Woman was explicitly told not to elevate her heart rate by a health visitor, although Fat Woman is not entirely sure that she trusts the health visitor yet. Fat Woman isn't sure that she'll get any time to do anything like go swimming once Thin Husband goes back to work, so she has stashed an Olympic bar and 100kg of weights behind the sofa and has kettlebells and dumbbells under the stairs. Fat Woman is suffering rather from a lack of mobilisation and has started back with her Tai Chi warm up and form. Fat Woman has no idea if she will be able to resume training with Personal Trainer again or even if she will be able to go out shooting either competition or with the Shotgun & Chelsea Bun Club, but she remains hopeful. In the meantime, Fat Woman has decided that this is a good place to end this incarnation of her blog. Fat Woman started writing Fat Woman Fit in January 2012 so the end of 2014 seems a convenient place to leave things. Fat Woman got fit, lost 100lb, dropped six to seven dress sizes and managed to get a handle on her thyroid condition, learned to love several sports, represented her County at one, and met at least a hundred really wonderful people, many of whom became friends. And of course Fat Woman had Small Baby. That's about as much of a happy ending as anyone ever gets in life.


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