Sunday, 15 April 2012

Fat Woman is teacher's pet

Fat Woman is now training with Personal Trainer twice a week. On Friday Personal Trainer announced that he was going to teach Fat Woman a boxing combination and that she would demonstrate it to the rest of the boxercise class that evening. Fat Woman is slightly clueless at times so didn't think much about this. The only thing that occurred to Fat Woman was that Personal Trainer was being very nice to her by giving her a chance to practice the combo. Fat Woman doesn't like words like "combo" and "crimbo" but due to repeated use by Personal Trainer the word "combo" has crept into her lingo. Fat Woman also remembers "combinations" being some kind of underwear in Victorian times so doesn't like to make too much of a stand on this.

It was a counter-intuitive combination that took Fat Woman a couple of minutes to get. It went:

  • Two left jabs
  • Block the tap by Pad Man on the left arm
  • A single right jab
  • Block the tap by Pad Man on the right arm
  • Right-left-right jabs
  • Duck the Pad man's blow to the head
  • Single right jab

Fat Woman encourages you to try this combination. Combinations are much easier if they are in even numbers or can be split into equal timings e.g. 1-2, 1-2, 1-2 or 1-2-3, 1-2-3. This is 1-2, 1, 1, 1, 1-2-3, 1, 1 and not even on a left then right split.

Fat Woman trotted blithely along to Boxercise that night feeling cheerful and confident that she would not disgrace herself or Personal Trainer if she was called upon to take part in a demonstration. Fat Woman knows Personal Trainer well enough now to be quite fast at pad work. If Fat Woman doesn't hit too hard she can go fast enough to be impressive. Fat Woman was confident she had the combination down so when  Personal Trainer called upon Fat Woman, saying:  "Fattie, get up here" halfway through Boxercise class Fat Woman was clueless and cheerful enough to respond with a cheerful "Woof!" as though she was a dog responding to a whistle.

Fat Woman did not expect what was reported to her by Tiny Friend as a "definite ripple" from the other class attendees, who were mentioned in Fat Woman liked hearing about this after the fact and enjoyed imagining the surprise of the Fit People who were wondering "Why her? Why not me?"

Fat Woman stood with Personal Trainer, went through the combo slowly, then punched it out twice more in quick succession. Personal Trainer told everyone to work in pairs, then he and Fat Woman demonstrated the combination half a dozen more times. Nearly everyone else was having trouble with getting the combination.

After last Boxercise Fat Woman had admitted to Personal Trainer that she had come across a little bit of fat prejudice. Fat Woman had said that usually such people revise their initial opinion of her as lazy and stupid in under two minutes i.e. once they hear her speak but there was no way for her to show that in a gym environment. Fat Woman had shrugged this off after the initial annoyance and a lengthy blog post. Personal Trainer obviously hadn't forgotten it. After showing off the combination and a short rest Personal Trainer set Fat Woman to work with the young lady whom had made the erroneous assumptions about Fat Woman in the previous session. The difference in the body language and the demeanour of the young lady was incredible. Instead of being cocky and assuming she was in charge the young lady was instead the textbook illustration of "submissive". Fat Woman was very gracious when the young lady volunteered that she wasn't as fast as Personal Trainer and did not hit overly fast or hard.

Fat Woman is so very impressed with the cleverness of Personal Trainer. Fat Woman thinks Personal Trainer is a political genius and has made him both chocolate covered vanilla protein fudge and choc-mint-strawberry protein cake in celebration of this.

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