Tuesday 24 July 2012

Fat Woman - born to serve

Fat Woman had purchased a GroupOn voucher for tennis lessons. Fat Woman had bought a tennis racket and arrived promptly and properly prepared at the tennis courts. Fat Woman wasn't greeted, despite being expected, but eventually made herself known to the owner. Fat Woman was immediately sent "over there" to where a young man and a middle aged woman were playing tennis. The young man was the Tennis Coach and the middle aged woman had been playing for three years. Fat Woman felt quite bad that she was such a beginner when paired with someone more experienced. 

Tennis Coach was a little unprepared for how little Fat Woman knew. Tennis Coach appeared rather taken aback when Fat Woman pointed out that before they "just hit some balls" he might like to tell her how to hold the racket. 

In fact, it was a very good job that Fat Woman did actually remember playing tennis at school. Instead of the  basic here's-a-racquet, here's-a-ball training Fat Woman was expecting she was pitched into rallying straight away. Tennis Coach did give Fat Woman some good direction so she can now forehand rally and serve. Tennis Coach also said useful things such as "Take a break, get some water" which was very important as it was 28 degrees Celsius. Fat Woman is not used to exercising anywhere but in the cool air conditioned environment of the gym. Fat Woman was glad she brought two water bottles along. Fat Woman also found that she wasn't a big melting lump of lard. At no point in time was Fat Woman out of breath. Tennis Coach sent balls fairly neatly her way, but Fat Woman didn't mind running for them a little. 

Fat Woman's irritation is with the business owner. All GroupOns come with conditions and Fat Woman had written saying she was prepared to be flexible about times, so long as they were in the day. Fat Woman had asked the owner to confirm the course was going ahead before she went out and bought her tennis racket. The owner spent quite some time explaining to Fat Woman that if there aren't five people in the class then it costs him more and you're getting individual coaching which is much more expensive. Fat Woman is disinclined to hear this. It really isn't Fat Woman's problem. If Fat Woman had received individual coaching she may well have taken up the offer of more individual coaching. Fat Woman was promised eight hours of tennis coaching for the price of four (£24 instead of £48). Fat Woman isn't inclined to pay £12 for a group lesson for a sport in which she has no experience or for a class run by a company that can't even handle a GroupOn offer.

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