Tuesday, 25 September 2012

Fat Woman gets rated

Fat Woman has been teasing Personal Trainer. Personal Trainer let slip that he and Buddy have been rating women by number. Fat Woman is not entirely clear on the rating system but it all seems to be entirely looks based. Fat Woman is perfectly aware that people do this but she doesn't necessarily approve. Certainly Fat Woman thinks that Buddy and Personal Trainer can be guilty of objectifying women, but they are the Internet porn generation and rather than lecture and bore on the subject Fat Woman makes her point through comedy. Fat Woman will also admit to a little mocking, but it is gentle.

Apparently Buddy has been challenged to pull a woman who is at least a six. Buddy is a nice young man, despite participating in this kind of thing, who seems to alternate between being wildly successful with women and being depressed at his lack of success compared to Personal Trainer. Fat Woman isn't privy to all the details but her favourite story is the one when all four of Buddy's current girlfriends turned up at the same party.

The code phrase in use is "get her number". This doesn't actually mean collecting telephone numbers.

Fat Woman likes to highlight the inappropriateness of the way the young men talk about women by applying their criteria to herself. Fat Woman told Personal Trainer the story of how last week Buddy rushed to help her ice her burnt hand and ended it by saying: "If only I was a six, I would have given him my number".

Fat Woman might have let just a little teeny bit of snark sneak in.

As mentioned before, Personal Trainer is a bright young man and very good at handling Fat Woman. When Fat Woman said that they should get back to work and make her into a six Personal Trainer caught her completely off balancing by shooting back: "You're already a six."

Fat Woman found this utterly hilarious. Obviously, Fat Woman was delighted that Personal Trainer didn't think she was so far into the negative numbers that he couldn't bring himself to tell such an obvious whopper but she hadn't imagined herself even qualifying for a rating on this scale. Fat Woman thinks that if you were really bending the rating scheme she might have scored three points for personality and two for cooking but the last point was definitely a sop to get her to shut up.

Fat Woman will take the pity points.

The truth of the matter however is that whilst Fat Woman may be a lovely, bright, kind, amusing person with numerous qualities that she won't list in full because she's still hoping to include "modest", she doesn't make a very good object. Certainly Fat Woman doesn't look at all like the generically thin and pretty young things that she has been informed rate as sixes. Fat Woman is happy being attractive to much older men than Personal Trainer and Buddy.

That evening Fat Woman asked Thin Husband what he would rate her on such a scale. Fat Woman was careful to specify that the scale one from one to ten, with ten being the highest rating. Thin Husband considered the issue long and hard and eventually announced he would rate Fat Woman at five and a half.

Thin Husband is lucky that Fat Woman appreciates his comedy and that Fat Woman hasn't actually learned to punch people yet.

Fat Woman is going to buy a badge with the slogan "I am 6" and wear it to training.

No comments:

Post a Comment