Monday, 7 January 2013

Fat Woman and the wet suit

Fat Woman wants to go open water swimming. This has been Fat Woman's aim for more than a year. It's why Fat Woman continued lessons with Swimming Coach after her initial improvement. Swimming Coach even promised to join her on the open water course, although Swimming Coach promises a lot of things.

To go open water swimming in Fat Woman's village you need a wet suit. This is because the swimming is held in the lakes of the Country Park. The lakes are really old gravel pits.

Fat Woman did some research and found that women's wetsuits go up to a UK size 20/22. Fat Woman waited until she reached that size before she started making plans. Then Fat Woman found that all the large women's wetsuits had disappeared from the web. Fat Woman wonders if she dreamt the large sizes.

Fat Woman had asked the Open Water course leader if he knew anywhere she could get a wetsuit. The Course Leader replied with a shop recommendation and the suggestion that some people hire wetsuits.

No hire company has a plus size wetsuit. The Shop does wetsuits that fit women up to 79 kilos. That's 12 and a half stone. Fat Woman isn't going to get in that weight range for at least another year.

Fat Woman had a moment. The kind of moment Fat Woman used to have when she was Fat Girl and wanted a pretty dress for her first ball but couldn't fit in any in the shops. The kind of moment Fat Woman hasn't had for years thanks to the Internet and a Visa card. Yes, there were tears because when you find yourself regarded as a complete non-person and effectively excluded it's pretty upsetting.

Fat Woman has pulled herself together, without even eating a biscuit. Wetsuits for fat women are apparently freely available in the USA. Fat Woman can use the power of her Visa card and get them sent over. A wetsuit is no an insurmountable problem and Fat Woman will not let it stop her.

Fat Woman is particularly fucked off because when watching "A year to save my life" one of the women was doing a triathlong. This led Fat Woman to think that doing a triathlon would be possible for her as well. Somehow Fat Woman assumed that getting a wet suit would be also be possible for her, even though she doesn't have the power of a production team behind her. Fat Woman feels stupid and is kicking herself for watching a diet porn show at all, even though "A Year To Save My Life" was actually much healthier than most others.

Fat Woman was going to write a blog post for UK women on where to get hardcore sportswear for fat women, but write now it would read: "Don't bother trying. Pay the shipping. It's your penalty for being fat and having the audacity to want to take part in sport."

Fat Woman promises to adjust her attitude in bit, when she isn't quite so fucking cross with the world.

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